Shot to Nothing

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Football Week: AFC West Preview

It’s football week here on planet Shot To Nothing and so we’re going to be previewing a different NFL division every day. And also comparing each team to a popstar… ’cause that’s the kinda shit we’re into. Bitch.

AFC West 
No hopers and possible dopers. In their predicted order:

The San Diego Chargers - Justin Timberlake
The Chargers are immensely talented in nearly every faucet of their team. Lead by a ridiculously good, record breaking running back, they were a joy to watch all season... until they lost to the Patriots. I'm not going to blame that loss on the 4-12 but you do have to wonder if Marty-Ball had taken the Chargers as far as it could. It was time for Doc Brown to turn up in his Delorean time machine and say 'Marteeeee, we need to get moving!'

If anyone thinks the Chargers aren't going to win this division in 2007 then steer clear of them, 'cause they got problems. This is the Chargers year and unfortunately for Norv Turner, if he doesn't get it done this season, he may not get many more chances.

The Denver Broncos - One of the other dudes from N'Sync
Come on now, you know that although the Broncos look sexy, they just aren't as talented as the Chargers.  Jay Cutler could well be the real deal, but he's still in development and the extra pressure this season may well find him out. I still think they'll make the playoffs 'cause shit, their secondary alone could probably take them there  (ok, maybe not...) but I don't see them progressing further then their first game.

The Kansas City Chiefs - One of the other dudes from N'sync
How big a QB competition is it when you've got Damon Huard in the mix? I mean really? Every year I think the Chiefs are going to be contenders and I run my mouth about them hoping they will perform well and everybody will think I'm a genius. It never works. Yes they are improving, but no, you can't look at them as big time players in the AFC yet. I still can't believe some people thought they might beat the Colts in the Playoffs last year... dumbasses.

The Oakland Raiders - The ugly guy from N'Sync who nobody remembered let alone liked 
(Was his name Al' by any chance?) The Raiders had possibly the worst O-line in history last season but this season they have er... actually you know, it's not that much better. Can anyone see the Raiders providing decent enough protection for their hot-shot rookie to make a mark this season? I can't. Then again Vince Young worked some magic on the Titans last year so maybe JaMarcus Russel can do it for the Raiders this year. But I doubt it.

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At 6:43 am, Anonymous twins15 said...

I think I might pick the Broncos in this division... I love Jay Cutler, and the addition of Travis Henry will make the running game more consistent. Plus, I'm just not a big Norv Turner guy (at least as a head coach).

At 9:24 am, Anonymous Cheap Shots #58: That’s As Bad As Calling Secretaries “Administrative Assistants.” « Signal to Noise said...

[...] The AFC West is Justin Timberlake and the other dudes from NSYNC? (Everyone keeps underestimating the NORV! effect on the Chargers. I am telling you, he will lose games for them.) [Shot to Nothing] [...]

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